Monday, March 24, 2014

Take heart.


My father had a heart attack earlier this evening. 

He is no longer in critical condition, but they will need to keep him in the hospital for the next few days to monitor his condition. The doctor said he was lucky to be alive, with three arteries being 95% - 100% clogged.

He looked so small and weak tonight, when we were finally able to see him. I couldn't hold back my tears. The nurse teasingly asked him what upset him, and he simply replied, "Oh, nothing, I just got emotional."

It is strange how life is, sometimes, sudden and surprising and sobering. Just yesterday we were celebrating my mother and brother's joint birthdays at my parents' home and then today all of us are in a hospital waiting room doing just that -- waiting.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Unfinished business.


I was included in a local campaign recently, to celebrate women making a difference in their communities in honor of National Women's History Month, and I felt so out of place and small next to some of the women featured. 

And I thought, well, this is good, this is very good, because this only means that there is room for growth. And when you are still growing, you are  still pursuing, still hustling, still living.

... 

It was my mother's birthday this past weekend, and the weather was warm and glorious. I stopped by with a mango mousse cake and spring flowers and I could feel Husband's amused smile and the sun and yesteryears' memories enveloping me as Mother and I raconted and exchanged tales of my and my brother's childhood between us. 

It was so delightful to hear the sheer happiness and exuberance in her voice as she started telling us about her work.

"It is amazing to be surrounded by people who get you, who get your ideas, who get your vision, who don't think you're crazy," she gushed. 

"I love it. I really love it."

And I started thinking, she turned 54 this year. I hope I don't have to wait until I'm 54 to find my bliss but more than that, I hope I don't die unfinished. 

And I squeezed my husband's hand just a little harder.

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